2008....so far

I decide to do this today instead of end of the year.

I am perhaps what some people would call as a blogger who is always missing in action. It is perhaps due to the fact that I do not have an audience that I find it easy to simply choose whether to blog down what I saw and felt.

2008 has been quite a year for me. Complications, new challenges, tests and many more not only for moi self, but for my family too.

I would like to thank all my friends who have been close to me - supporting me, guiding me, helping me back on my own two feet when the going gets tough and many many more stuff for me to list down. I salute you guys for your patience, understanding and tolerance when dealing with me. I don't have to name anyone in particular, but you guys know you are. My biggest thank you to all from the bottom of my heart.

I would like to also thank someone else who once made a deep impact in life. Once again, no names mentioned, but this particular person has thought me alot during my course of acquaintance with him. I learned what kind of a person I truly was - selfish, unappreciative, indesireable and I was constantly reminded what an awful of a person I was, or perhaps still am. I hope to be able to change myself to be someone better in the future. I don't blame him for doing what he did. The decisions he made was wise and appropriate, I was clearly off-limits and unsuitable for someone of his standing.

When I learned of some 'ugly truth', I was deluded. I made excuses for him and thought I deserved all that happened. I clearly do but I am glad it happened. Had it not, I would still be stuck and unhappy in a spot with no turns. While many warned me, I ignored all that thinking those people didn't know what they were talking about. Yes, I was disillusioned by my mentality that my life wasn't as rosy as I thought it was. I am not playing victim here. I am to be blamed for all that has happened. I let my work and studies get in the way. I got complacent with things and people around me, assuming everything would stay the way it was that I never bothered to take note of their feelings, their needs or even to stop and ask if they are ok. I was (maybe still am) selfish and self-centred. Sad, but true.

2008 would be coming to an end soon. I still think about him now and then and I hope he is truly happy with his lifestyle, the way it was or perhaps, the way it always have been. As for me, I truly am happy with my newfound happiness and mending my ways to hopefully be a better person.*winkz*